Philosophy Part I

What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin ?
Who cares - neither one's a guitar

How many guitar players does it take to cover a Stevie Ray Vaughn tune ?
Evidently all of them.

"Mommy! Mommy! When I grow up I want to be a guitar player!"
"Now Johnny, you can't do both!"

How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?
Twelve. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it better.

Jazz guitarists are never very happy. Deep inside they want to
be rock stars, but they're old and overweight. In protest, they wear
their hair long, prowl for groupies, drink a lot, and play too loud.

Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners?
So the rest of the band can understand them.